PART SEVEN : THE RETURNING... (OR TO PUT IT ANOTHER WAY, THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE DOWNRIGHT FUCKING UGLY)

PART SEVEN : THE RETURNING... (OR TO PUT IT ANOTHER WAY, THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE DOWNRIGHT FUCKING UGLY)

Our last day at the hotel was spent mainly hanging about, saying our goodbye's and
Thank You's to members of the hotel's staff, and sitting around in the bar, drinking
far too many coffee's for anyone flying out that evening.
We were due to be picked up by the hotel's airport shuttle van at 7.20 in the evening
to take us to Sharm airport so we had a long day of hanging about after packing our
stuff and placing it in the hotel's luggage lock-up and vacating our room at midday.,

 

 

Lunch time we actually had a meal as opposed to snacks because you don't need
your stomach overloaded on a flight and we're definitely hip to that, so basically
we hung about.
It's boring, because there's not a lot you can do without getting stuff out of your suitcase,
but that's just the way of it unfortunately.

 Dinner is served at 6.30 in the evening so a quick snack and we're outside sitting in
the hotel's reception until our lift appears, which it does, literally bang on 7.20, and we're
the first passengers to be picked up. Two more pick-ups to go and then we're airport
bound.
The other two pick-ups are no problem and so we're off to the airport.

We get there and go through their first 'strip' scan and then we are given a 'leaving card'
which we are expected to fill out with all the details that they've already been given twice
already. (Visa and entry card) This seems to go on forever...
Finally we get through the scanner and their bloke queries my keys...
Yes, there,s a house key, a car key, a couple of Gambian wardrobe keys, three small keys
for unlocking suitcases when you're travelling depending on the weight you're allowed to
travel with, and a bottle opener.  Yes... They are all mine, yes, this does that, this does this,
they do that, and these do this. It's not difficult...
And when we get our boarding cards we find out we're not even sat in the same row on the
'plane
Great !
And then somebody walks past us cursing that the 'effing flight' has been delayed for an hour...
Things seem to really be going well, don't they ?
Ok, I'm off to check.
Yep. Delayed for one and a quarter hours.
Thanks a fucking bunch, Whizz Air...
I wonder what excuses we'll be given when we get on the 'plane ?
Late flying out and late flying back.
Two hours later and we're still there with no announcements being made.
The Whizz Air team have all fucked off and we seem to be stuck there wondering what's happening
The board is still stating that the flight has been delayed.
Finally, at 1am in the morning, the Egyptian airport security team turn up (with machine pistols)
and proceed to tell us that there will be no flight out that night because the aircraft had been
diverted to Cyprus.
However, we are all going to be taken to a hotel to get our heads down and we will get a flight
out in the morning at about 11.00 am. The coach will pick us up from the hotel at 9.30 and could
we all please follow them and they would escort us to our coaches outside to take us to the hotel.
Leaving the airport was a scream in more ways than one...
I had to stop at the top of the escalator to let an old lady with a stick pass me and I am rammed
in the back by some Polish cunt pushing his kid's push-chair.
I literally go down having lost the use of my left leg, and this cunt just walks over me screaming
that his children should be allowed through first...
When I finally manage to put some weight back on my leg, we seem to be way behind everyone
else and I stagger outside to the coaches which look full, but one of the staff helps with our suitcase
and we manage to get seats on one.
It is my sincere hope that when aforesaid Polish guy meets his maker, he has done it by drowning
in his own excreta...
Can't say fairer than that.
It's now 2.20am in the morning and we are just about to be booked in for our overnight stay at the
hotel...
Dunno about you, but I'm totally knackered and my leg is paining me some.
After checking it, there's no blood but the bruising is huge.
The room is ok, but there's no coffee in it, only tea so that will have to do.
Let's get our heads down with alarms on, as breakfast is apparently served between 7.00-9.00am.
Ok, we've had about three and a half hours sleep but we're up and breakfasting at 7.05...
The back of my left leg is now purple and black.
But finally, a coffee... 

 

 

                                                                                                                

 

The coaches turn up at 9.25 and we're seated.
Ok, let's try again shall we ?
 

We'll probably have to go through the same rigmarole again... Which we do, including having to fill out yet another leaving card, but this time it's minus the key crap.
Whilst we are all sitting and waiting to get into departures, we start talking to an Asian family sitting next to us, comparing hotels and that sort of thing. It's a Mum, two teenage daughters and a young lad,
and guess what they disliked the most ?
Bet you've forgotten my first post, haven't you ?
The absolute gluttony of some of the guests.
But unlike us who had not witnessed it previously, they had.
The piggery of the Russian clientele which they had first encountered seven years previously,
so it's not a new thing and they disliked the waste and greed as much as we did.
Nice to know we were not alone in our thinking.
Mum said it made her so angry but there is nothing to be done as the hotels won't stop it
as it would affect customer numbers.
So how's that for depicability then ?
Fucking Russians.
Civilized countries should bar them from travelling, that would stop it.
Finally, we're in and Sharm airport departures have a Smoking Lounge.
Ok, so the coffee in there tastes as if it's arabica beans filtered through camel piss, and the price
is astronomical, but it's coffee.
Personally I think that all airports should have a sign up outside stating that 'You are now entering
the airport premises. Don't travel unless you are prepared to get completely screwed over by the
prices of everything we sell in here'.
That would at least be an honest advertisment for their wares.
But it's not just here, is it ? Our local one Luton is equally as bad, and don't even get me started
on Heathrow...
A final observation on the smoking lounge.
It seems to be a lot more peaceful than the rest of the airport. Ok, people in there are smoking and
vaping but there's no hassle. People aren't treading all over you or trying to push in front of you.
Therefore I believe every airport should have one.
But try telling that to the current crop of UK politicians.
Another hour spent waiting for the bus to turn up to get us to the aircraft and then another three
quarters of an hour spent standing up in it because there aren't enough seats before it finally
takes us to the outside edge of the airport where our aircraft awaits.
And finally we are actually on board.
Not sat together mind, but at least we're across the aisle from each other.
The flight staff are apologetic about yesterday's absolute fuck-up which was apparently caused
by piss-heads out of Luton getting drunk and stupid, and so before fisticuffs developed on board
they diverted to Cyprus and ejected them.
Had it not been for the work regulations intervening, we could have flown out last night,
but unfortunately they did.
Too many hours would have been worked by the staff.
This means that now the plane has actually turned up there is no food upon it unless you
want noodles or pasta or some tapas thing, but the croissant'y bread stuff that they advertise
for their meal deal isn't on the flight, so no meal deal, just full price everything...
Typical !
We get to Luton four hours later.
Thankfully, the bus is there so we don't have to pay for a taxi home.
It's possibly the only good thing to have occurred on the whole return trip.
And to end with a couple of items that may be of interest if you are considering a trip out
to Sharm El Sheikh. Yes, we can wholeheartedly recommend the hotel we stayed in
(details in the blog) No, we didn't go to visit the Pyramids because the flights to Cairo from
Sharm are £250.00 each, and the bus trip which is cheaper is one of eighteen hours so we
decided against it. Maybe next time, as we'd like to return to the hotel with Sibo.   Weather wise, it's about 22-24 degrees during daylight hours but if the breeze gets up later, then that will drop a bit, and you have to remember all this took place in the last week of November so it wasn't bad, considering...

And there you have it, a week in Sharm El Sheikh, the good bits, the bad bits, the amusing
bits and the fun bits.  It'll give you some idea anyway...